On Accepting the Hard Stuff

When life's realities are just hard

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Last week I had a hard day.

I was unable to sleep well the night before. This was partially due to emotions related to the current geopolitical situation, but mostly it involved being confronted with some tough realities about my current life situation.

What made it even harder was not the circumstances itself, but the reality that there was nothing more I could do about it right now.

It just is what it is.

And it is out of my control.

Sometimes accepting the moment as it is and realizing that it is out of my control is relieving. It might take the pressure off in some way. Other times, recognizing what is out of my control feels empowering in some way.

But that wasn’t the case here. In this case, fully facing the reality really, really hurt. There was nothing more I could do. And knowing that really, really hurt.

So I woke up that morning in tears.

The tears continued on and off throughout the day whenever I was reminded of the tough reality.

Sometimes when life’s painful realities show themselves it just hurts.

You can’t avoid it.

You can’t rationalize it.

You can’t “fix” it in anyway.

Because it just is what it is. And to try to avoid it in some way, would only make it harder in the long run.

So I let myself cry many times that day.

By the afternoon, I called my husband for support and to let him know how I had been. He listened attentively and with care.

Fortunately, he was able to have some free time that afternoon, so we spent the rest of the afternoon outside.

We grabbed a blanket and walked to a nearby park and sat in the grass along the blooming cherry trees.

As we sat, I no longer felt the need to talk about it. I shared all I needed to share. I expressed all I needed to express. Now, I just needed him there and a moment of fresh air.

Then, slowly and gradually, the sadness began to subside.

I felt lighter.

I felt better.

So on that afternoon, while sitting in the grass along the blossoming cherry trees with my husband by my side, I found a sense of peace in accepting the present moment just as it is — regardless of how hard it all is.

And from that sense of peace, I also discovered a newfound strength to just keep going.